Friday, March 28, 2008

Romeo X Juliet 6

Dr. Whirlwind stands atop the effigy and demands the innocent people be set free. "Now that you have the genuine article, surely you've no need for these imposters!" The crowd's all, "Hey, yeah! What the fuck, dude?" The guards aren't having any of that, though. They yell at the crowd and point sharp things at them. When Dr. Whirlwind reminds the guards that their duty is to protect the people, the crowd again goes, "Why, yes. That man has a valid point." Everyone yells at everyone until a guard overlooking the ruckus gets impatient and lets loose a flaming arrow, hitting Dr. Whirlwind in the shoulder. Lord Dipshit turns with a chuckle and says he'll let the fake Whirlwinds go free as 'compensation' for getting shot with fire. Once the innocent men are set free, Lord Dipshit tells Dr. Whirlwind that once he's dead, "we'll reveal your true identity." Knowing that his family would be next on the chopping block if that happens, Doc says that he can't let that happen. He looks down at the still-flaming arrow and gives the famous 'Don't Cry for Me, Neo Verona' speech - which I'm sure is very touching - then drops the arrow on the tinder below the effigy. The crowd looks on, not quite sure what just happened, and Juliet, of course, loses her shit and runs away.

Romeo's flying above the city, as he's doing any time something important is going on, and sees the fire. He sees someone from the crowd being beaten by a guard and asks what's going on. Lord Dipshit (Cerimon) tells Romeo that the Crimson Whirlwind is dead. "He said he was no match for the great Cerimon and set himself ablaze." I'll stick with 'Lord Dipshit.' Romeo does the shaky anime eye before flying away on his magic horse, but doesn't get far before spotting Juliet crying below him. He lands then runs up to her, saying he's so happy she's alive, because he was so sure she was the Crimson Whirlwind, which is just silly, I mean, HER? The Whirlwind? That's just stupid. Right, Juliet? ... Juliet?

... oh. Juliet tells Romeo that she can't see him any more and Romeo asks why. She tells him, as dramatically as she can, that she is the real Crimson Whirlwind. Romeo's eyes get huge and he clearly can't believe it. Despite the fact that mere seconds ago, he was so convinced that she was the Whirlwind. So convinced, that upon hearing of the Whirlwind's suspected death, he was off to cry in a corner with his Dashboard Confessional CD. But now it's a shock, for some reason. Before the silence can get anymore awkward, Juliet flips off a railing to a walkway below where she runs away. I bet all the cool shit is happening off screen. That's why everyone keeps running there.

The next day, Benvolio is expositing that his father considers the whole 'Whirlwind thing' to be done. Adding the understatement of the year, "Threatening to burn innocent citizens alive was simply going too far. My father plans to punish the captain of the police [Lord Dipshit]." For no conceivable reason, Romeo almost lets it spill that the Whirlwind killed last night was a fake. This clown is part of the ruling order?

After the break, we're in court. Because that's where you go to spice up your drama and/or action story. I know I can't get enough of parliamentary procedure. Romeo and his father take a seat high above everyone else, while Benvolio's dad is joined by Lord Titus down below. Lord Titus is laughing like an ass and clearly drunk. [Point of reference, Titus Andronicus was Shakespeare's tragediest tragedy, actually losing popularity in Victorian times for being too bloody; I feel good things coming] The first bit of business today is a decree from His Majesty the Archduke Montague saying, "Martial law is cool; agree or disagree? Also, disagreement means death." Benvolio's dad is the first, and only, to stand and disagree, saying that to continue to let bad things happen will, like, not make good things happen. The Archduke tells the court to shut up. He's not being oppressive, pshaw. "Is it not the father's duty to punish the child when it errs? The father must whip the child, even as tears stream from his own eyes. For a family to live under a single roof, there must be discipline above all else." Turning his back to the court, the Archduke bellows that if the governor wishes to protect the commoners so much, he should become one, and decrees that Vittorio de Frescobaldi (Benny's dad) be stripped of nobility. The court then votes on both the martial law bill and the denoblement of the de Frescobalid name. Everyone in court stands to show their affirmative vote, including Lord Titus, who can't look Vittorio in the eye. "Don't take it personally," he says. Hey, I'm with you. The bearded bitch is scary.

Team Odin rides on a gondola looking sad and pensive. Antonio asks everyone if the Doctor's family knows that he died. But no one answers.

Benvolio and family are being driven out of Neo Verona. Romeo flies down on his horse to see his friend off. Benvolio tells Romeo that they're bffs, and that if he ever needs anything to just pick up a magical, steampunk phone and give him a call.

Mrs. Dr. Whirlwind is telling Juliet that they're thinking about moving to the country. The city's too... the-military-wants-all-the-poor-dead, nowadays, "so my husband wants to leave." And, just to make us sadder, their little girls are in the background playing with Antonio, having the greatest time ever. Juliet tries to say something, but Mrs. Doctor butts in, "He believes in you. He trusts that the iris still blooms." Then one of the kids just has to ask, "Where's daddy?" Without faltering, Mrs. Doctor tells the kids that their father has to stay in town to watch over his patients. Which the kids totally buy. After their cart is full, Juliet tells the family to be safe, and Mrs. Doctor replies, "And may the whirlwind blow again. He lives within you even now, so keep your spirits up."

On their way back, Juliet asks why Mrs. Doctor didn't blame her for the death of Mr. Doctor. Curio says, "Lancelot left everything to you." What? First of all, we're starting to pull from the wrong set of mythos. Secondly, does that answer anything? Does he mean to say that Mrs. Doctor doesn't blame Juliet because she knows Juliet was there to watch, and already blames herself for it? Shut up, Curio. Francisco adds, "Besides, he became the Crimson Whirlwind; the real Crimson Whirlwind." Okay, the both of you are in the expository penalty box; you may only speak when the plot absolutely demands it. As they get closer to wherever the hell they're going, a shadowy figure walks out to greet them. Juliet and Curio get ready to attack, but Francisco stops them, saying he's an ally. Proof of which can be seen by his doofy looking badge.

What's up, mysterious stranger? "Vittorio de Frescobaldi and his family are set to be assassinated. This is presumable by order of the archduke himself. The elite guard is waiting to ambush him on the outskirts of the city. They will attempt to make it look like the work of bandits." Well boy, you are sure full of information it would've taken a full scene or two to dole out artfully. Thanks for getting us to the last act! Hope to see you again when the plot gets bogged down unnecessarily by emotional tertiary characters.

In the Carriage of Imminent Doom, Benvolio is trying to comfort his crying mother. "But we have to leave our home behind and move outside the city..." with POOR people! Dad tries to paint a sunny picture on this crapfest, when the cart hits a pothole and shakes violently. We cut outside to see that the carriage is stopping by some neo ruins... yes, ruins in the futuristic, still thriving, floating, Victorian-like Neo Verona. Aside from the buildings that can be seen past the cliff, they're pretty much in the middle of nowhere. When Dad looks through the peephole to talk to the driver, he's almost stabbed in the face. Dad is ready to stay and fight off the driver-assassin for a few seconds while his family runs, but Benvolio and mother only get a few steps before a small fleet of soldiers come running out of nowhere. Nobody expects the Neo Veronan Inquisition. Just as things look dire, Team Odin jumps down like so much Major from Ghost in the Shell and attacks. It should be noted that Juliet, while still dressed as Odin, is NOT dressed as the Crimson Whirlwind for this fight. While the boys take care of the guards, Juliet squares off with the driver-assassin. She tells the family that, if they wish to live, they'll come with her. They start to run but the driver throws a dagger towards... any of them, I guess. Juliet deflects it with her sword, but falls to the ground as if she's been hit. I'm not really sure what happened there. Pulled muscle? The assassin comes in to finish his job, just as a Ryouma is heard nearby. Juliet, horribly hurt somehow, is just barely able to look up and ask if it's Romeo. But it's not. It's... this guy.
If we're dipping into Arthurian mythos, I'm declaring all bets off. My guess is Zach from the Final Fantasy VII series.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I didn't understand the concluding part of your article, could you please explain it more?